Blackberry and the Sanctity of Marriage

One of my favorite restaurants in my hometown is a “soto” restaurant. A uniquely Indonesian-style soup, soto is a coconut-milk-based soup which can be very rich particularly to those who are not used to it. This particular restaurant specialized in “soto babat”, which features cow’s tripe. As you can imagine, the combination of coconut milk and cow’s tripe makes this dish particularly rich. The restaurant’s other specialty is “otak goreng”, which is deep-fried cow’s brain, yet another rich dish. I’ve been going to this restaurant regularly since I was a little kid since this is my grandmother’s favorite restaurant. Today, however, I was treated to a very interesting scene in the restaurant.

As we finished ordering our dishes, we sat down and saw a couple walked in to the restaurant. The couple went about ordering their dishes and they sat next to us. While they seemed like a regular couple, they looked awfully quiet. Not long after they sat down, the guy (we’ll call him “Mas”, the honorific Javanese title for males) suddenly looked down and lifted up his Blackberry. He immediately started typing on his cellphone. Almost in unison, the girl (we’ll call her “Mbak”, the honorific Javanese title for females) also looked at her Blackberry and started typing. So far, they had not talked to each other.

As our food arriving, I noticed that the couple was still busy reading and typing on their respective Blackberries. Not too long after that, their food arrived. I could see Mbak starting to take pictures of the food while Mas was still intensely typing. They still had not talked to each other.

Suddenly they realized that the waiter had forgotten to bring their beverages. They talked to each other for about ten seconds, and Mbak got up to talk to another waiter*. The waiter came back with the drinks, and the couple thanked him. They had talked to each other for about ten seconds.

While they were eating, the couple was still busy reading and typing on their respective Blackberries. Since Mas had “soto babat”, he used spoon and fork and therefore had two clean hands to type. On the other hand, Mbak had rice and some fried food. In a traditional Indonesian fashion, Mbak used her right hand directly to eat instead of spoon/fork/knife. In a modern Indonesian fashion, Mbak used her left hand to hold her Blackberry and her left thumb to type. They still hadn’t talked to each other for more than ten seconds.

I wanted to wait until they were done eating so that I could observe whether they actually had a conversation after they finished their meals, but my mom wanted to leave as soon as we had finished. So we left them still eating and typing. And not talking to each other.

* Unlike in Western countries, it is acceptable to request service from any waiter in a restaurant as all waiters are jointly responsible for your table (and others).